Something has been a little off in my relationship with Jesus lately, so I talked to Him about it in prayer. In front of the Blessed Sacrament, I looked up wondered why things felt different. I told Jesus, “We need to talk. It’s not you, it’s me.”
No, I don’t want to break up with Jesus! The last thing I want is to be apart from Him, but our relationship needed work. It felt a little like we hit a plateau. For a while, I felt like I was growing in leaps and bounds in my relationship with Christ. I was learning more and seemed to be having more of those awesome, “AH-HA!” moments of clarity and understanding. Of course, Jesus hasn’t pulled back. His love is constant and ever-lasting so I knew any issues were definitely my doing. But I also wasn’t consciously aware that I was pulling back either, so I felt confused. It wasn’t until I sat in adoration talking to Jesus about the situation that He began to shine a light what was going on. He ever so gently reminded me that I had recently been contributing a little less to our relationship than I was before.
I had, without realizing it, becoming a little lax about a few things. I had some changes in my work life and it threw my prayer schedule off a bit. In my new morning routine, I was still praying but it felt rushed and I was frequently skipping reading Scripture. I knelt down in the Chapel and told Him that I was struggling a bit to figure out how to get back on track. I asked Him to let me feel that closeness, that light that I so longed to feel when I thought about Him again. And just like that I did. All I had to do was ask and it was like He flipped a light switch!
Well, that’s not exactly all I had to do. No matter what type of relationships we have in our lives, whether it’s friends, families or spouses, we know that every relationship takes effort. Relationships aren’t two people giving 50/50, they are two people giving all. Let’s face it, Jesus is always going to give 100% and we have to do our part. I hadn’t. I had slacked off a tad and it showed. So, after I asked Him to help me get that warm, fuzzy feeling back, I had to do what was necessary to keep it going. For me and my situation, this required looking at my schedule and re-vamping my routine to make Jesus a priority. Like any of our human relationships, it meant that I had to sacrifice a little to make it better. I had to give a little more and Jesus accepted it with the grace and love that only He can. And He didn’t just accept it – He perfected it. Jesus took my little offering of effort and made it into more than I could have imagined.
My encouragement to you is that when you feel like your relationship with Christ isn’t what it was or what you hoped it would be, talk to Him about it. Ask Jesus to help you draw closer to Him and be willing to give what you can. It will be enough because Jesus wants us close to Him, so He’s always there to pick up our slack.
Michelle lives in Baton Rouge with her husband and two kids. She is a cradle Catholic and runs a small business. Michelle is slightly obsessed with St. Padre Pio and 80s music.