Why we DON’T use Birth Control

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Yesterday, the popular website, Buzzfeed, gathered 22 female employees for an article highlighting why the women use contraception. Other articles circulating social media had snippets of reasons that women use birth control. Most of these recent pro-birth control articles have been written in response the Supreme Court ruling in the Hobby Lobby case.

The Catholic faith teaches that contraception is immoral. Why? Because sex is for babies and bonding and contraception serves neither of those purposes. It thwarts our call to be open to God’s gift of children and it doesn’t allow us to offer our spouse the fullness of ourselves as part of sexual love, because we’ve removed our fertility from the offering. The Church does recognize that women may need to use hormonal contraception for health reasons; article 15 of Humanae Vitae states that a woman may use hormonal contraception to control disease if she doesn’t implicitly intend to use it to prevent conception. Fortunately, there are other, healthier ways to overcome many of the problems hormonal birth control aims to fix and we encourage our readers to investigate those options.

To that end, we’d like to share some of our reasons for NOT using birth control. These are our beliefs and we don’t wish to force anyone to accept or follow what we believe, but we do wish to educate others on a perspective that is rarely offered in the media. Because while all faithful Catholics eschew contraception, our reasons for doing so are as varied as the women themselves.

We do not use birth control…….


“Because observing and charting my fertility is empowering!”

“Because my fertility shouldn’t be treated like a disease and medicated away.”

“For I don’t want to ingest a class 1 Carcinogen, which is what the Pill has been designated by the World Health Organization.”


“Because the hormones can lower your sex drive (and cause weight gain). And I like having a sex drive!”

“Because I consider working with my fertility a form of feminist empowerment.” 

“Because I don’t want the side-effects–especially the lethal side-effects!–of hormonal contraception.”

“Because I spend too much time and money on organic, non-GMO and hormone free foods to fill my body with synthetic hormones.”

“Because there are doctors who can work with my fertility to actually heal my reproductive health problems and they can’t do that if I’m on birth control.” 



“Because my fertility is my superpower.”

“Because I don’t like how the hormones affected me psychologically.” 

“Because I don’t think it’s healthy for my body to think it is perpetually pregnant.”

“Because I think the delayed gratification of using NFP to avoid pregnancy is good for our marriage.” 

“Because having a family is on my bucket list and I want to be my healthiest when that time comes.”



“Because I cannot imagine one of my children not existing.”

“Because in addition to suppressing ovulation, hormonal contraception can prevent pregnancy by flushing out a newly conceived child before it implants. And I’m pro-life.”


“Because I accept my body the way it is.”


“Because fertility is not a pathology.”

“Because I am responsible and make mindful decisions, accepting the consequences to every action I make.”

“Because we like our sex environmentally friendly.”


“Because I think the self-control needed for periodic abstinence is good for me and our marriage.” 

Because I don’t like the idea of drinking water with other people’s estrogen in it.”

“Because when my husband is willing to wait until my body says we can be together, it makes me feel respected and appreciated as a woman.”


“Because I love the first little flutters of a baby growing within me.”

“Because a baby in mommy’s tummy makes my older kids so excited.”

“Because I love babies!”


“Because it is against my faith.”

“Because I don’t like feeling like I’m solely responsible for our family planning; I want my husband to participate in the decision-making process as often as I do.”


“Because the first thing my mom’s oncologist asked her when she was told she had breast cancer was, “Were you on the pill?”



“Because I don’t think the very natural, normal condition of fertility ought to be medicated.”

“Because siblings are a gift.”


“Because nothing in the world smells better than a baby’s head.”


“Because sex isn’t a right, it is a gift.”

“Because I love that my husband desires all of me–including my fertility.”


“Because I love the way my husband puts his hand on my pregnant belly.”
“Because knowing where I am in my cycle every day gives me a feeling of control over my reproductive health.”
“Because life is a beautiful thing. Always.”
ETA: We thank each of you for your comments and feedback. We encourage everyone–Catholic and non-Catholic–to research what the Catholic Church truly teaches about contraception and family planning, because this issue is one of the most commonly misunderstood tenets of Catholicism. Our beliefs about family planning are best understood within the context of God’s wholly positive plan for sex and marriage, which John Paul II beautifully explained in his series of talks commonly referred to as the “Theology of the Body.”  For more information on Theology of the Body, please visit www.theologyofthebody.net. 

83 Replies to “Why we DON’T use Birth Control”

  1. because NFP doesn’t interfere with our marriage vows – we love each other exclusively, faithfully, freely, and fruitfully – vows every Catholic makes at his/her wedding. We say “I do” to accepting children.

  2. I don’t use birth control because Abstinence is 100% Free, 100% Effective, 100% natural, 100% safe, and demands a man not use use me as a sex object!

  3. Because I respect that every woman should have the right to make that choice for herself, and in my case it makes more medical sense not to.

  4. Dear Jeanne, tha you for a good article giving reasons not to use contraception. I did notice that you said married Catholics cannot use birth control even for medical reasons and that you cited catholic.com which cites Humane Vitae. Catholic.com and Humae Vitae are not saying that birth control cannot be used for medical reasons, in fact Humanae Vitae says in no. 15 that birth control can be used for medical reasons whereas no. 14 says that one cannot terminate a pregnancy through birth control methods.

  5. ugh! some of these comments are uninformed!
    I am a Christian. I am abstinent and am 30, but have been using BC pills since I was 17 because I didn’t have a regular cycle but also because my cramps are so bad they actually make me puke and have caused my body to seize up in a way so that I can’t move! This pain I have dealt with since 12 with my first period! I went off of them for a little bit to see if I no longer needed them, but I still do! The is nothing wrong with using medication to be pain free,healthy and able to live a healthy life!!!

  6. Jason, thank you for your comment. I’m trying to find clarification as someone else had questioned me about it. I believe it falls into the principle of double effect. If birth control works as an abortificient because the couple was on it during a fertile time of the month, I cannot see how it would be acceptable to use at all while still sexually active.
    Again, I’m looking for clarification, but my understanding is that if a woman is on hormonal birth control for “medical purposes,” it cannot be used as contraception and therefore the couple should abstain.
    I do understand that the Church permits the use of birth control for non sexually active women in treating medical conditions, but I think there is a good amount of NaPro information out there that can show that there are other ways to treat those conditions, without the risks.

  7. Thanks for this awesome post! So many of my friends have tried to convince me that birth control is an acceptable way to deal with my horrible cramps, but that was the reason my mother’s doctor put her on birth control when she was a teen. And guess what? That did cause her to have fertility problems, and even a miscarriage. Because of my mom’s struggle I refuse to rely on a pill. Your fertility is a blessing and the pill robs you of that.

  8. Because the birth control patch gave me a DVT at 17.
    Never again will I put my health at risk like that

  9. there are a lot f pictures with women saying “because theyre not broken or sick” im defiantly not judging and I understand that women also want control over there bodies that doesn’t include using birth control, yet this was a response to buzzfeed and some of the women from buzzfeed do have medical conditions that need to be regulated by birth control. I am personally on birth control myself, im on depovera, yes there are consequences, but I found what works for me without this I would be sock, some people do not realize that a heavy period does make you sick. I am very supportive of all the women who don’t need birth control, you guys are good examples of women having control over your lives but I would hate for your choice to be taken away, what if you had a medical condition and it could only be helped with birth control, you women made the choice to be on birth control, yet the women who are on birth control made the choice to do so. there is a conflict but we need to accept that some women want this and some women don’t but lets also realize that some women need this and continue to let birth control be a choice for every woman to have. I commend all of you wonderful women

  10. Thank you Angel. Would your opinion of Depo change if I told you that a friend of mine got pregnant on it, and that it ended up causing a cancer called choriocarcinoma because her pregnancy was not discovered until it had spread throughout her body? She started having headaches back in July of 2005 and was told that several unexplained periods of bleeding were side effects of the depo. It turns out that she was miscarrying, and that the fetal tissue spread and sat in her lungs and her brain. She had two major brain surgeries a week apart, and then received chemo and radiation to get rid of the rest of the cancer. She ended up having to have a hysterectomy in the Spring of 2006.
    In June of 2006, she began having seizures as a result of the surgeries and scar tissue and has basically lost her driver’s license since.
    There will always be better options out there over hormonal birth control. Sadly, most doctor offices make lots and lots of money to push certain drugs and they are not honest with their patients about the risks.
    Check into NaPro technology for your conditions. I bet you’ll find someone willing to work with you and not give you something to simply cover up your symptoms. Good luck.

    On a side note, we do not approve any comments that include foul language or that are simply combative in nature. Thank you.

  11. Just to clarify, although it may be morally licit to take certain forms of birth control for health reasons, I am also generally against doing so because, as your example rightly pointed out, it can mask symptoms and not address the real issue. Some forms of birth control may put a woman in a “principle of double effect” situation but there are many factors needed for this to be the case. For example, if a married Catholic woman who is sexually active was taking an oral form of birth control that prevents ovulation (barring for the moment that although some pills intend to prevent ovulation, they are not always successful in this endeavor) for a morally good reason for the health of the patient (I’ll let moral theologians determine which ones are morally good and licit), and if there was a fertilized egg from one of their unions that was unintentionally aborted then the principle of double effect does apply with no culpability on the part of the couple. It is important to note that in Humanae Vitae, there is no mention that a woman must abstain from sexual relations while taking a pill for medical reasons and there is no Church document that says only non-sexually active women may take it. In fact, in no. 15 the late Holy Father says that one can take a form of birth control that may impede procreation even while knowing this fact. To play devil’s advocate a bit, there may be a symptom the woman is trying to overcome that may be mitigated by taking oral contraception for many years (again, I don’t advocate for this and would suggest against but it is morally licit) and there may not be opportunities to practice NFP even during allegedly infertile periods (I say allegedly because hey, we never know what God can do as in the case with Elizabeth). Pope Paul VI is very clear that once knowingly (I have added the knowingly part since we aren’t always sure right away) pregnant, a person cannot take that oral form of birth control even for medical reasons. Of course, IUDs, Ru-486, and other oral abortifacients are morally prohibited. I’m only speaking of the ones that claim to suppress ovulation. Hope that helps.

  12. I noticed that one of the women featured stated that she doesn’t take birth control because she “loves and respects her husband”. I’m just curious what the reasoning is behind that statement? How does your decision not to take birth control have anything to do with your respect for your husband? I’ve always thought of birth control as a very personal decision, and what I get from that statement is that this woman feels as though her body is at her husband’s disposal. If he wants her to become pregnant, does she feel that is something she has to do? Please clarify, I’m guessing I’ve misunderstood and I am genuinely curious!

  13. Your statement about not using it for medical purposes is incorrect. The Church has in fact always taught that it is licit to use hormonal therapy, such as that found in BC, for valid medical reasons, even between married couples. This is because the intention is different, as it is aimed toward correcting a medical issue and not towards the prevention of a conception, although that may be an I intended side effect.

    I am an NFP user and actually agree that it is usually a bandaid to an underlying issue and not the best way to treat whatever is going on. However, as someone who has a degree in Catholic Theology, I feel an obligation to correct the erroneous statement.

    For further clarification, this is from the USCCB:
    Is there ever a time “contraceptives” may be used for medical reasons?
    Catholic teaching does not oppose the use of hormonal medications – such as those found in chemical contraceptives – for legitimate medical purposes, provided there is no contraceptive intent.
    But artificial hormones typically treat only the medical symptoms. They do not correct the underlying disease or condition. They also carry the same physical health risks as hormonal contraceptives.
    Thankfully, with growing advancements in understanding fertility, knowledgeable gynecologists can often prescribe non-contraceptive drugs and recommend safer and healthier treatments to correct underlying problems or eliminate discomfort.

  14. Just a reminder that we *do* hold everyone {Catholics, non-Catholics, unbelievers, etc.} to a higher standard of conversation on our corner of the internet. IF your comment was not approved, I invite you to visit our comment guidelines.

    Those who have chosen to mock our beliefs or drop f-bombs were obviously not approved.

    Sorry, there just isn’t enough time in the day and there are a LOT of websites that will allow you to say absolutely everything that crosses your mind, some of whom have no regard for others or respectful dialogue. We aren’t one of those. 🙂


  15. Jessica, I would imagine that “provided there is no contraceptive intent” means that the birth control will not be used at all in a contraceptive manner. In this case, the only 100% way to assure this doesn’t happen is to refrain from sexual activity while on the pill.
    This is why my post says “sexually active” couples.
    Perhaps I am misunderstanding something in the teaching?
    It seems to me that with your wording, you are basically saying that there are just means to use birth control as long as there is a medically acceptable reason. I would argue that it is a slippery slope.

  16. Well, darn. I feel terrible that I have to take oral contraceptives to control my crippling acne now. I feel like I will never have a solution if I have to stop birth control. I’ve been to dermatologists and bought expensive products. I don’t know what to do now…my doctor told me it wouldn’t cause cancer! Where are you getting this information? It is scary 🙁 I have used birth control for its…intended purpose… as well even though I am not married and cannot afford children right now. I guess I am just a terrible catholic in general… What’s the use.

  17. Hi Alison! I’d like to address your question although I’m not the one in the picture (well, in any of the pictures actually!). Loving and respecting your husband doesn’t mean that your body is at his beck and call or that you allow him to do whatever he wants, whenever he wants with it. Instead, when you love and respect your husband you want them to be a part of the decision making process, meaning you want them to participate in understanding your signs for fertility and then making a decision together whether or not to abstain or go ahead and make love. This is ultimate love and respect to share the intimate details of what’s going on with your body so that together through prayer and communication you can come to an agreement together on what actions to take during your fertile time (or your non fertile time as it may be).

    As you can see it doesn’t mean you are bending to your husband’s wants/needs but that you are being completely open to discussing what is good for your marriage at that moment. Taking artificial birth control means that you don’t have to talk about your marriage, like you say, it’s very one sided. But with NFP you continuously discuss and are open to hear what your spouse has to say about either abstaining or not (and potentially making a baby together). It is truly opening yourself up to your spouse. I hope this helps some!

  18. Michelle, thanks for your reply! I come from a pretty liberal background, so when I see something like “I don’t take birth control because I love and respect my husband” my mind automatically assumes the worst. I appreciate you taking the time to explain your point of view to me, it is definitely refreshing to hear from someone with different values and ideals than my own. While I don’t necessarily agree that taking artificial birth control means you don’t have to talk about your marriage, I can see how NFP would open communications between spouses and make it that much easier to talk about what you both want. Thank you!

  19. Beliefs may differ, but respect is universal. While it’s fine for women not to use birth control, don’t you think others should respect the women that DO use birth control. Those who choose to use birth control do not insist others use it as well, they simply insist that they have the freedom to choose whether or not they wish to use it. I respect the women who choose to use birth control while I also respect those who choose not to; but that’s what it is: a CHOICE. Just because you believe something, does not mean everyone else has to has well. If your religion says not to use birth control, fantastic! Don’t use birth control. However, not everyone else follows the same religion, and you shouldn’t force them to follow yours.

  20. Thank you Alison! I agree with you that many couples who use BC do indeed talk to each other but with NFP it lends itself to the necessity of talking about those times. Thank you for your comments and for being open-minded to hearing my perspective too. I think that is the best way to learn and have open communication. I appreciate your comments so much! 🙂

  21. Frenchie, I’m wondering which comment in particular is not respectful in your opinion? Honest question. If you are talking about the ones that mention self control, perhaps I should remind you and plenty of others upset by this post that the post that it responds to basically says that “as women we should be able to do whatever we want with our bodies whenever we want to.”
    Show me an example of a pro birth control post that is out there that doesn’t say that lack of birth control restricts a woman from “enjoying sex” or “being able to do what she wants.”
    Our purpose here is to show that sex has a much greater purpose and meaning than simply enjoyment.
    Most of us embrace the procreation aspect of it because we want large families, but those are only some of the reasons we refrain from birth control. The other reasons, as we have shared, have to do with the dangers associated with use of birth control.
    None of us have said that we disrespect women for using birth control. But I think many of us can say that we are sick of it being shoved down our throats as of late (since the Hobby Lobby ruling, specifically) over a misunderstanding of the ruling to begin with. Every time I turn on my newsfeed I am met with how women are now supposedly being denied their “right” to birth control because of it. That is absolutely not the case.
    This post was to counter the reasons all of those women flaunt for using their birth control with the reasons that we do not.

  22. This is AWESOME! I want to see a post about what your husbands and other guys say, too! It’d be just as powerful!

  23. Because men respect me for waiting for marriage. A male neighbor stopped a guy from trying to hook up for a bootie call. “Naw man, she’s not like that…she is the type of girl you have a relationship with and have meet your mama.” I never said I was waiting for marriage, but that self respect was what my neighbor say.

  24. Because men respect me for waiting for marriage. A male neighbor stopped a guy from trying to hook up for a bootie call. “Naw man, she’s not like that…she is the type of girl you have a relationship with and have meet your mama.” I never said I was waiting for marriage, but that self respect was what my neighbor saw.

  25. I have no say in what my wife does with her body because it’s her body. I’m okay with that. I don’t feel the need to tell her what she should or shouldn’t do and even if I felt the need to express that to her it doesn’t change the fact that it’s her body. Why do people think they should have more control on what a woman chooses to do with her own body than that woman has? You are free to do what you want with your own body. You should just worry about that and stop trying to tell other women what they should do. It’s none of your business.

  26. Hi Jason, if you read through the article again you will see that we are not telling anyone what to choose for her body… only WHY we choose not to use birth control. Much like the Buzzfeed article that told why those women DO use artificial birth control this is just an attempt to show why this group of women do not. It’s an attempt to show the opposite side of the argument- which is equally as valid as those who use birth control and want to share with the world why they choose to.

  27. I’m glad you included the bit about the estrogen in the water. As a man, it disgusts me to think that I may be consuming what other people have peed out because it does not break down.

    I wish that one of them had also been “Because I don’t want it to interfere with my ability to be naturally attracted to the best mate” since birth control prevent women from properly interpreting the pheromones of men, which their bodies can use to discern whose immune system is more complementary to their own.

  28. Jason, I don’t think that any woman involved in this post is telling anyone what to do, but rather they are expressing their reasons for the choice that they made.

    Also, I do understand that you do not want to tell your wife what to do and I would agree that you shouldn’t. However, I would also say that as her husband you have a duty to share your opinions, hopes, fears, feelings and emotions with her, especially in the area of intimacy. As a married couple, decisions should never be made without the input of your spouse.

  29. Although I truly understand the church’s teaching, I am one of those rare women who has actually been granted an “official exemption” by our Pastor to use hormone birth control…why? Because I have genetically high cholesterol (since first measured when I was an 80 lb 13 yr old) that has only responded to Statin Drug therapy. My cholesterol is well over 400 uncontrolled and definitely could lead to cardiac issues and early death! Not wanting my 6 and 3 yr old to loose me at the age of 35, and not wanting to subject a surprisingly conceived child to horrific birth defects/death from the statin drugs, we use hormone birth control with bi-monthly ultrasound monitoring to make sure there are no surprises!

  30. If modern women were truly feminists, and wanted to exert their own control over their bodies, then they wouldn’t deny their body its natural function.

    Modern feminism chooses to deny the female body its natural function and delays or ends life. If women really wanted to be pro-women, they would retain their pregnancies and see them through as a way to celebrate their unique function in the world.

    As it is now, denying a woman’s body its function and purpose only serves to further empower men to objectify and use female sexuality and creates a culture of objectification. Men are able to physically gratify themselves fully while women have to deny themselves in order to maintain this status quo. Men have no need to be responsible or attached to any one particular woman because the natural end product of sex is avoided. This “freed” sexuality empowers them to abuse their own sexuality.

    Ultimately modern sexuality denies womanhood as it superficially fulfills manhood. It’s a broken system and is made possible by birth control which is ironically, the choice many women take to feel in control of their sexuality.

  31. Coming from a biased point of view as I am not Catholic nor on the pill for any reason, and I don’t hold a solid view on either pro- or anti-pill, I noticed some overlap between this article and Buzzfeed’s concerning birth control. One reason along the lines of “no one should control my reproductive health but me” appears in both articles. I think that highlights the right to choose, each for herself, whether to be on birth control or not. I love that, the ability to choose and decide what’s right for yourself, even if another woman has decided something else is right for herself. I will be taking all that is published here, as well as proper research, doctor considerations, and Buzzfeed’s employee’s points of view when I do make the decision about whether or not the pill is for me.

  32. Lulu – I’m so sorry to hear you’ve had such a hard time finding a solution for your acne!! I’ve had some difficult medical issues, too, and I understand how tough it can be to not find a great solution. As I understand it, if you are unmarried and not sexually active, there’s no problem taking artificial birth control to address another medical issue. It definitely would be wise (as with any medicine you are prescribed) to investigate the potential side effects and risks (I’m sorry, I don’t have links at hand to the cancer risks with the Pill and such).
    As for using it for being a bad Catholic because you’ve used birth control for its “intended purpose”, that doesn’t make you a bad Catholic, it makes you human. All of us make mistakes and are sinful. The Church isn’t a pedestal to show off the saints, it’s a hospital for us sinners!! One beauty of the Church is that we have Reconciliation. You can go and confess your mis-steps and be forgiven of your sins, and go on to strive to avoid sin in the future! One thing that may help your decisions is to remember that even pills intended to prevent ovulation generally have a “back-up” method of preventing implantation if you do still ovulate and that egg is fertilized. That means it can cause a very early abortion. I actually also took the Pill for a few years before I was married, and that knowledge helped to strengthen my resolve to stay chaste with my boyfriend at the time – I could not stand the thought of possibly aborting a baby just for the short-lived pleasure of uncommitted sex!

  33. Martha – Technically you’re right, NFP is a form of birth control. However, I think the “un-voiced” key word is “artificial”. In this post, the Buzzfeed post, and in general usage, birth control is usually understood to refer to “artificial birth control” such as the pill, IUD, condoms, etc, and not to natural spacing of children using NFP.

  34. This is a great article and you have done a wonderful job in making it relevant and interesting to read, as well. I want to point out a small typo though – ‘does not condone the use of birth control’. Do you mean ‘condemn’? ‘condone’ means ‘approve of’, I believe.
    I wanted to post the article on my Facebook page but I hesitate to do so with the above ‘typo’ thanks.
    Frenchie; I think that Jeanne is giving the reasons why it is unhealthy to use artificial contraceptives and suggesting safer ways. I don’t see that she is being disrespectful at all of those who use artificial contraceptives.

  35. ~”Because NFP families come in all sizes!”
    NFP is so freeing! My daughter was “planned” but only about 30 minutes prior to existing. 😉 I don’t know of ANY artificial means that would afford such freedom.

  36. Jeanne, I am not going to go into a long theological debate with you but as someone who has a degree in Catholic theology who has studied this in depth, and actually uses birth control due to horrific hormonal symptoms, I can safely assert that you are misunderstanding what Jessica is saying. As I am currently the vocation of the single life, I can’t not personally attest to what decisions I will make if and when God graces me with the married life but I can say after much studying and close conversations with religious men and women, I do not feel as a practing, God loving Catholic, there is anything morally wrong with my use of artificial hormones. I am also striving in the Church that point out that what you do and say is hurtful to women who do not have an alternative. I quite literally could not function without it during my period. Endometriosis and others diseases are painful enough without people who claim to love God putting down their fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. I understand who the majority is with whom you are speaking against, but please remember the minority in the future. It comes off a lot like hate speech when you are incorrectly citing Church documents and poking holes in anyone’s defense of why birth control may be helpful in licit ways approved by the Church. Just offering my two cents as a child of God, Catholic theologian, and woman who uses birth control for medical reasons outside of my control.

  37. Jeanne, in Angels defense….I saw the “f” and thought it was symbolic of a bad word, too, but then realized it was a typo. Should have been “of”. Thanks for this awesome project and post!

  38. Hi Em, if you notice above I responded also to Alison who had a similar question about that one. I hope it helps you understand what MY take is on that one anyway! Thanks for asking for clarification!

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  40. Jeanne, Jessica is actually correct. According to the principle of double effect. Hormon therapy (aka birth control) can be used. Please review section 15 of humane vitae.


    In fact it does not state that the married couple would have to abstain from sex, which you would think they would be very clear about if this was necessary. Catholic women can continue to use NFP while using hbc for therapeutic means in order to prevent a miscarriage and continue to respect the spirit of NFP and openness to life. In fact some NFP instructors and teachers have addressed how to do this.

    I understand being passionate about life and respectful of our sexuality. But we must be careful not to go beyond what is actually taught by the church. Catholic women that are truly faced with these medical necessities are already suffering physically and do not additional burden of indefinite abstinence while treating debilitating diseases.

  41. Overall, this is a beautiful article celebrating the choice to respect our (amazing, beautiful) fertility. Some of the statements are troubling, though. For example, “Because I want my husband to actually be involved in our decision to have sex and know that I’m not carrying the weight alone and that he is not just using me for sex”.

    Please let that sink in.

    Decisions of whether or not to have sex should always be mutual, respectful, and with regard to both spouse’s desires and consequences (and those of the couple as a unit). This is a dangerous statement, implying that if a couple decides that its not the right time for a baby, his or her sexual desire is just “using the other for sex”. This is a gross concept which does not fall in place with Biblical teachings. Sexual decisions should always be mutual and mutually beneficial.

  42. I am a Catholic mother of five wonderful children. I find issue with two things in your article.
    One: It is NOT true that “any form of contraception, even for “medical purposes” between a sexually active couple is never permitted”. There are many reasons and situations in which even Catholics may – if they choose – use birth control.
    Two: God gave each of us free will and we must each choose for ourselves. It is presumptuous of us to deny other humans the free will that God gives us.

  43. My husband (who became Cathoic prior to our engagement) have explicitly practiced only NFP. We have 10 children (2 miscarried angels in Heaven). Even throughout our micscarriages, what helped with the pain of our loss was knowing we completely & totally give our fertility to our Creator. We believe that lovemaking i zzz a gift whereby we co-create,so-to-speak,with God in bringing forth tiny infant souls. We would NOT reject God’s plan. I know not everyone believes this way. I just know we have always experienced God’s immense love and have been blessed beyond measure. I hope & pray for everyone to ask God’s will be made known to them as they seek to live out His plan in thier lives. By all means we do not judge others, we only are sharing and live as an example of what we know & feel God has chosen. God bless.

  44. What about the Catechism #2370? We can’t go just by Humanae Vitae – although that is important as well. In this section in the catechism, it is stated that “every action, which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible is intrinsically evil.” This seems pretty clear that, even if the intention is for a medical purpose, the end cannot justify that means.

  45. Sarah, that quote you gave from the Catechism is actually from Humanae Vitae 14. The CCC is quoting HV and that quote is saying that using a form of birth control for the purpose of rendering procreation impossible is evil. However, HV 15 says that it is morally licit to use a form of birth control (usually oral/hormonal types, never abortafacients) for medical purposes, so long as addressing the medical condition is the primary reason for using birth control. If a woman is married and having sexual relations with her husband and needs this hormonal therapy, the Church does not forbid marital relations while taking the pill. In fact, Pope Paul IV says that a person can use artificial birth control for medicinal purposes even though it can be foreknown that this will impede procreation.

  46. Okay, so what are they referring to in humane vitae than? It seems pretty straight forward. I mean it’s titled “lawful therapeutic means” and there is no mention of stipulations. Kind of a pretty big whoopsies on JP2’s end. On the other hand the quote from the catechism is pretty vague. Honestly my understanding is this is speaking about foreplay and finishing what you started. 🙂 Also the cannon lawyers, bishops, oh yeah and JP2 (again) that wrote our Catechism pull directly from encyclicals so there shouldn’t be a conflict, right?
    …….So does that mean that any woman who has gone through menopause can no longer have sex? What about a hysterectomy? Why can’t you use NFP in conjunction???? It seems that is the perfect solution for someone with a real medical necessity. I’m not talking about acne, I’m talking about uncontrollable bleeding that necessitates blood transfusions. I’m not talking about cramps, I’m talking about constant pain that requires going on disability and not being able to work or take care of your children. The hormones that are used for birth control are not in and of themselves evil, it is there usage that is evil. If the usage is not intended as a birth control, but to treat a disease it is not evil anymore than using cytotec to induce labor is the same thing and using cytotec to have an abortion. Not the same thing. Using NFP in conjunction continues to respect sex for what it is and acknowledges it’s dual purpose of unitive and procreative even while taking hbc. I have a feeling this wouldn’t even be an issue if we were talking about a heart medicine that lowers sperm count to almost zero.

  47. Cait—I hope I am not misinterpreting your comment but you cannot use NFP in conjunction with HBC. HBC messes with your bodies natural rhythms in which case it is hard to determine what may be the underlying cause of the pain/bleeding/etc. I have been using NFP to avoid and achieve pregnancy and to help figure out my possible PCOS and bad cramping. NaPro technology has completely changed my life!

    I also want to point out to those who question the “love and respect my husband” comment that when a couple gets married in the Church their vows include that they will give themselves “freely, totally, faithfully, and fruitfully, lovingly accepting children from God.” So when I vowed to my husband that I would love him FREELY and TOTALLY that includes that I give ALL of myself, INCLUDING my fertility. If I withhold my fertility from him, how am I giving him all of me? This is part of the reason couples who use NFP properly have a divorce rate of less than 2%.

  48. I plan on using condoms when I get Married at the age of 23. But only for a year or so. I just have a large fear that I’ll bring a child into the world, and not be able to provide for it. I grew up in a big family where the thrift store was awesome and $15 was expensive. Sometimes we had to borrow money for food. I watched my parents stress and fight. I never want to put my children through that, so I want to be financially sound before I have children. I want to still shop at second hand stores, but I don’t want to have to worry that I can’t feed my family

    1. Hi Cierra, I was reading old posts and saw your comment. I wanted to tell you that regardless of how financially sound you make your life prior to having children, the fact remains that you can’t fortell the future. Any number of things can happen to turn your life upside down and make it so that you lose your home, are unable to feed your family, or can’t afford to buy clothing for your kids. As a mother of a large family I can tell you that we don’t regret a single child that we have even though we struggle many times to make ends meet. Being open to God and to each other has brought our family a love that many don’t have in their lives. I know the idea of this at 23 is very scary… I know, I was 23 once as well… but believe me when I tell you that no matter how prepared you think you are, no matter how much money you have set aside, no matter how much you “plan”, life happens and can take all those plans and all that money and toss them out the window. It is good to plan and it is good to set aside money to provide for our future children, but don’t let the fear of not being able to provide convince you to put a barrier between you and God or you and your husband. NFP can help you space your children until you think you are ready to provide for them in the manner in which you hope. It is highly reliable when followed closely. Many prayers for you and your future husband (or husband if you’re already married now!). <3

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  50. How about those of us who are taking BC “those nasty hormones” to prevent ovarian cancer? You know so I can actually have kids and not die. Sorry it’s a win-win on my end.

    P.s.- women who take birth control love children just as much as you. We just want to offer the very best timing for them. (And you know, actually be alive)

    1. Jen,

      With all due respect, could you provide articles that show a direct connection to birth control pills that *prevent* ovarian cancer? I’m not sure you’ll be able to because birth control does not actually *cure* anything, but rather masks symptoms. Prayers you find the information you need that gives you a complete picture to the harm that the pill causes.

  51. So Ok don’t take the pill, get the coil fitted or get your chap to use a condom’ Why as women should we let some old celibate blokes, I mean the Pope and the priests, tell us what to do with our bodies? No contraception, no abortian, even if the female life is at risk.. These ridiculous old men with their acorn hats are trying to tell liberated women what we can do. Utterly stupid. No women priests in the Vatican either.

  52. I hate When Woman get Pregnant and have babies, One of my house mates sisters or both didn’t use birth control. and i’m not happy but i am still a Virgin at 37 and had no sex at all…. I’m afraid of haveing sex with my boy friend of almost 7 years…..

  53. I’m not using anything abortive (hormonal, insert/iud) or uncomfortable/takes away feeling (stopped using condoms/likewise in my mid to late 20s). I want babies and that is my choice, which is what fake prolifers and proaborts don’t support! I am sick of stupid people misjudging me or talking about me behind my back or telling me that its crazy or not normal to want babies! You fakes lifers and choiciers go ahead with your choices to have bad sex with condoms/antifeeling rubbish or kill babies THOSE ARE YOUR CHOICES, SO RESPECT MY CHOICES OR YOU ARE NOT A REAL PROLIFER OR A PROCHOICER! SEX IS NO FUN WITH ANYTHING I THE WAY AND ALL ABORTIVE METHDOS ARE PLAIN SINFUL EVIL AND ARE NOT CHRISTIAN.

  54. My concern is with the Catholics who do not abstain. Overpopulation is an epidemic, and when some couples have 7-10 children, the rate grows at an alarming rate. If parents can’t afford the responsibility, the ones who do abstain or are sexually responsible end up paying, or the children grow up in constant need. I respect all religions, but sometimes they can infringe on the wellbeing of others. In the time the bible was written, there was a lot of sickness and miscarriages. Times have changed, and we simply don’t need religion to direct the numbers of our population anymore. My hope is that the Catholic faith won’t shun the young women who choose to use contraception for their own wellbeing or the wellbeing of others.

    1. Eva,

      You are mistaken that overpopulation is an epidemic. It’s not true at all. If anything, the distribution of resources should be called into question – wealthy countries’ waste vs. impoverished countries.

      That said, it’s not religion that dictates the number of the population, but an openness to the gift our Creator gives us. We live in a world that wants us to shun our biology {this is evident in the rejection of fertility as well as acceptance of our God given sex, male and female in favor of what an individual desires to be}.

      Times have changed, yes, you are correct. But, thankfully, we have a religion based on the core teachings that Christ gave us that surpass the trends that shift as often as the winds. Our Faith is steadfast…the world is not.

  55. If child support was eliminated and a fair access to custody being 50% was the way men could have a more cavalier attitude towards pregnancy. In a third world country this is the way.

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