The Easter Season is upon us. 50 days of celebrating the time that Jesus spent on Earth after his Resurrection. Such a glorious time of year. Spring is all around us: trees are getting their leaves, flowers are blooming, birds are chirping, and little baby animals are making their appearances into the world. Life is all around us. What could be better?
Unfortunately for many all this new life can be a painful reminder of what they do not have. For those who have experienced a recent loss, this season of new life can make you want to crawl back in bed and pull the covers over your head not to be seen again until fall.
Hope can seem like an impossibility in the midst of grieving a miscarriage.
Don’t talk to me about hope! How can you say we should be hopeful?
Don’t you understand what just happened?
Just as the death of any loved one brings on moments of despair as we grieve for the person we have lost, so does miscarriage bring about the same kind of despair and hopelessness. It is hard to see hope when all we see is death. And it gets harder and harder to see any hope if you continue to experience death through multiple pregnancy losses, as I have. When a child dies we lose not only the child but also the hopes and dreams of our own changed life. Hope seems to die.
But there is hope. This is the lesson of Easter. The Resurrection is our hope! Jesus’ Resurrection from the dead is not just hope for us, but hope for our children as well. They too will be resurrected on the last day and receive heavenly bodies.
In this Easter season, as we are surrounded by white lilies, spring bursting forth, and the life-giving waters of Baptism, we should think of our children who have gone before us. We should hold on to the hope we gained through our Baptism into Christ’s death and resurrection. Hold on to the hope to see them one day again in Heaven. We must hold on to the hope that our families will be fully reunited in Paradise.
The pain of miscarriage, of any loss really, always stays with us. It might get easier as the years pass, but it never really goes away. And yet, this hope we have in the Resurrection is a reminder that all is not lost. If you have recently suffered the pain of miscarriage, stillbirth or infant loss this may seem like too much to hope for.
I can’t imagine seeing hope in this way. Everything seems so hopeless right now.
That is okay. No one expects you to see hope right away. But trust me, in time this will be a great comfort. Easter is a beautiful time of year. The beauty of new life springing forth from the Earth will in time bring comfort and you will begin to see what a blessing it is to have a little one interceding especially for your family and praying for the day when you will be reunited.
Have hope. Look to the Resurrection and know that this is our future as well. The love of God is amazing!
Thank you for writing about this! I’ve had seven miscarriages. Most of my friends and family do not understand. The depression that comes after the miscarriage is ugly and hard to snap out of. If a loved one suffers a miscarriage, I recommend patience and showering them with prayers and love.
Stacy: I’m so sorry for the loss of your children. It is never easy and it is made more difficult when the loved ones around us do not understand. I’m glad you liked this and hope it brings some comfort. And thank you for a wonderful recommendation! Patience, prayers, and love can definitely bring much comfort to those suffering the pain of pregnancy loss. Thank you for visiting!!
Thank you for this reminder. Honestly, it was only this truth that made the loss of our son, Ben, at 18 weeks bearable for me in the long-term. It reminds me so much of that beautiful Christian song that came out a few years ago: http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Held-lyrics-Natalie-Grant/18FCE3861AEBFAAE48256FFF000C4CAB
It took nearly two years before I was able to say, with complete sincerity: “My son, I rejoice for you.” But even in the darkest pain, I was moving toward that peace. My heart breaks for my sisters who lose children but do not know Christ, for I can’t imagine the agony of the Cross without the hope of Easter.
Beautifully said, Misty. 🙂