Years ago I found myself in the darkest days. Illness, fatigue, and depression were my constant companions, but not only. Of course I had wonderful family support, but I also was given a desire for God like none I had ever known. This desire led me to sit quietly in Church nearly every day for even a few moments of time. But this desire also led me to seek out advice on how to pray before the Blessed Sacrament. I decided to take a chance and contact a Benedictine monk whom I heard speak on EWTN. He was kind enough to send me an email that changed my prayer life for good. I hope it will also help yours.
I told him in my message the various obstacles I was facing, the mental strains I battled, and the desire for God I had. I asked how am I to pray when so many things are worrying me? How can I BE with God in the midst of it all? How should I pray? His answer was short: Go to sit before the Blessed Sacrament daily; when you are there keep bringing your thoughts gently back to pondering who God is. Think about His attributes. Don’t limit time, but also do not force more time. He will take care of everything.
And He did.
Instead of planning my prayers, or listing all my concerns, I sat for the first time and considered who God was? Perfect Beauty. All Loving. All Goodness….. Day after day I went, and well………, so should you. I discovered God is eagerly waiting to just be sat with and loved. For I believe it is impossible to sit and ponder His attributes and not become grateful beyond words and loving beyond description toward Our Creator and Savior.
But what of petitioning in prayer? God wants that too, right? Yes. But try to petition like this: My dad is in pain and ill. Or…make haste to come to my son. Or…..I am tired and worried. After focusing on Who God is in prayer, the petitions become confident and statements of fact and knowledge that God can and will help when He knows is best. Why? Getting to know someone builds trust in who he truly is AND in what he can do. We have seen this in getting to know our husbands. With God we need to do the same.
Let me give a practical example. My husband started a new job in November. We soon saw the commute was just too long for us to remain in our most beloved home and town. So we searched for homes in the town where he works now. One thing led to another….and only three weeks later… our home has been prepared for sale, a contract with a new house has been signed, and after 1 day of our current home being on the market, we have potential buyers! One day! This is ONLY work God can do! Sure we put all the muscle into it, willingness to follow where He leads, but in prayer….I sat and stated the fact, “ we cannot afford the large gas amounts for my husband’s commute.” And then let it go. Look what He did! Look what He is doing! I praise Him publicly in this post because credit is due only to Him for the marvels He does.
Here is another: my 16 year old wanted to buy herself a car. When my husband was told when he was to start his new job, I knew with one car my two daughters would be limited on their unique activities they have done for a long time, and which are good for them. I found however the day after I uttered a short, “my daughter needs a car, I need her to have a car” prayer…..and I then mentioned the need to two friends out of the blue….the one quickly texted her brother who was selling his son’s Honda. By the Friday before my husband’s job starting my daughter bought herself her own car and has matured considerably. Would this have happened if I did not utter a simple prayer, nor would it have happened if I had not willingness to open up my needs to others? I do not believe so. God has been so good to us!
So many little utterances from the heart have proven to me that God hears, God helps….He is ALL that is GOOD. He wants for us to know and love Him….and to ASK SIMPLY.
So as your life gets ahead of you (and my family’s life begins a new journey in a new town), let us not neglect to take time to sit before God and ponder Who He IS. “Let Him take care of the rest.” You will be amazed at where He leads you.
About Susan Jaynes
I have been a wife for 22 years, am a mother of three great kids, and a Catholic convert for 20 years. I am blessed to homeschool my two teenage daughters, now for almost five years. I live with struggles of anxiety disorder, constant fatigue, and food difficulties which were worsened by my previous illness with Lyme Disease. These opened a path for me to learn from God what real motherhood, simple life, and silent prayer really are. God has been very good to me. I owe Him All.